PSA- Depression

So many things being said about depression right now I feel like this is a good opportunity to say something while everyone is still paying attention. 

I see that suicide hotline being passed around like it’s a fucking cure. 

So I’m going to give a little bit of advice for those of you who truly want to make a difference in a depressed persons life or make a tiny dent in this overwhelming disease. 

My advice is simple and honest,

DON’T BE AN ASSHOLE

Don’t be the person who shames someone for seeking help. (Therapy, counseling, antidepressants, a fucking shoulder to cry on)

Don’t be condescending, “you just need a change of attitude”, “try harder”, “stop moping”, “that’s not depression”, “you just want attention”, “we didn’t have depression in my day”

 

(Um you did, you just didn’t call it that)

Don’t make someone feel bad for being sad. EVERYONE feels sadness, it’s perfectly human to feel sad. 

Sadness is not a sign of weakness.

Don’t make someone feel like they’re worthless/a burden. I see this message being said/shown everywhere, all around.

There’s nothing you can say that will “fix it”. You simply can’t, it’s a complicated issue. 

You can listen, for sure, if you’re the kind of person who is good at listening. Not everyone is and that’s okay. 

 

And last but not least, if someone has attempted suicide or successfully committed suicide don’t fucking think they’re weak. Because you honestly don’t know. You don’t know what cards that person is dealt with, their background, their support system, the chemicals inside their brain, how long they’ve been fighting for… you don’t know anything… 

Even doctors don’t have all the answers, not even science has a real grasp on this disease. 

 

I always think of depression as being “in the negatives”.  You can try so hard to be at “zero” and make such good progress… but then someone who started off at 1 and is now a 5 thinks of you as “lazy”… and it just kills you. 

There are human beings suffering in silence, in shame. We need to show compassion, even if we ourselves don’t truly understand it. 

That’s it. That’s my advice. 

Don’t be a dick.

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DAMN.

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Kendrick Lamar just made history and won the Pulitzer price in music for his hip-hop album, DAMN.

I’m obsessed with his most recent music, I love the beats and the lyrics and I’m truly sorry I’m not more eloquent or knowledgeable on the subject.

I just know that when I’m driving and one of his songs come on, I feel like a badass, I feel like a boss-ass bitch. He raps about Compton, but really any person from humble upbringing can relate to his music.

Anyway, thanks for being powerful and cool, Kenny.

P.Val

•30•

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I turned 30 last week… and I feel pretty fantastic.

I’m not sad to be leaving my 20’s. I feel like a woman, I feel a sense of purpose and determination.

I’m strong. I feel like I’ve learned some life-saving lessons. I feel happy in my own skin (finally), I feel like an adult who isn’t spinning out of control (finally), I feel… like I have my own back. I feel resilient.

I’ve made it this far. I’VE SURVIVED.

Bring it, 30.

Annihilation

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I love this movie. I really can’t stop thinking about it.

I hope to someday find someone who loves me the way Kane loved Lena. If even a carbon copy that an alien makes of you loves me, than fuck-me… That’s love!

Also, sorry I haven’t posted in almost a year… I’ve been busy with life and stuff.

Mental Health Awareness Doodles

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Continuing with May, mental health awareness month doodles.

If you’re feeling down, try not to isolate yourself. Generally when we’re feeling gray, the brain will make it seem as though things are worse than they really are and if those thoughts go unchallenged they can start to seem real. It’s best to not be alone for this reason, there’s no one to challenge the negative thoughts, to distract you. Try to spend time with loving, compassionate friends, family, or even a pet can be helpful. Don’t worry about being a burden on them, generally people who care for you don’t mind. In fact, they want to help. If you haven’t found friends or family who can be there for you, keep looking there are good people out there. They will make themselves available, they’re easy to spot.

It doesn’t have to be serious business either, you can just ask your friend to hang out, catch a movie, grab a bite, go for a walk or hike, etc.

Of course there’s nothing wrong with being alone and enjoying your own company. As an introvert, the time I spend on my own is literally the best. The difference is in how you’re feeling, if you’re feeling peaceful and balanced then there’s no harm in being by yourself.

Can’t wait to share more tips with you guys. This is something near and dear to my heart.

Until next time,

P.Val

Mental Health Awareness Month

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May is mental health awareness month, as someone who has suffered from depression I have a thing or two to say about surviving from it.

The first and most important step is to love yourself. Fiercely, unconditionally love yourself as you are, flaws and everything. All of it, leave nothing out. Accept yourself as you are and it doesn’t matter if others love you or not; Just because others don’t love you doesn’t mean you aren’t worthy of love. Repeat after me, “I deserve to feel loved” (eventually it sinks in, I promise). Anyone who disagrees or tries to make you feel otherwise can exit themselves from your life, believe me you don’t need this kind of people in your life.

The second step is resilience. Bounce back from anything, no matter what you’ve been through, what they’ve done to you, the things you’ve suffered and are currently suffering and fighting against … bounce back, always bounce back . Like some annoying plastic bouncy ball, never stay down. Never let anyone or anything keep you down and make you feel beaten. Be like that super annoying song from the 90s,”I get knocked down, but I get up again, you’re never gonna keep me down”.

Ill continue with more steps throughout this mental health awareness month.

Your gal pal,

P.Val